Aesthetics Over Everything: Alex Dimitrov & Catherine Cohen
Aesthetics Over Everything: Alex Dimitrov & Catherine Cohen
Catherine Cohen and I were supposed to do an interview for Paper Magazine a few years ago. It didn’t happen. But we kept emailing each other and trying to make plans to meet. That didn’t happen either. Until one night last May, at a party, there we were. On separate ends of the room. Me flirting with her boyfriend in an attempt to get her attention. And of course, succeeding.
Her boyfriend was talking to me about Formula 1 or something confusing. I’m gay. I only know tennis and other sports with hot people. But the best part was getting stuck in the rain after the party. And running to the nearest bistro for a drink.
Catherine is a Leo. She’s warm and funny and brilliant. She’s an actress. She’s a comedian. She’s a person of the world (and do you have tickets to her UK tour?). She’s also recently off Twitter. Which makes her smarter than me, for sure. Anyway. Maybe one day I’ll follow in her footsteps and log off permanently.
AD: We met at a party. I hit on your boyfriend. Not really but also I needed to get your attention. You're a Leo. So I naturally love you. What song did you last have on repeat and do you believe in true love?
CC: It's not not true! We sprinted through the rain to get martinis. Perfect New York night! I felt an instant connection to you but then I read on your stack that everyone says that to you. Whatever I'm basic and beautiful. Clichés are so true this year. I've been listening to “I haven't got anything better to do” by Astrud Gilberto. It's very us.
I believe in true love so much. Are you in love right now? And what did you just eat? I'm struggling with food.
AD: Instant connection! Yeah, a lot of people say that to me but with you it was real because I felt it too. It's funny you say that about cliches. I recently tweeted something about kittens and sunrises.
True love? Forever. I will never stop believing. Plus, jaded people are boring. You and your boyfriend had the best energy that night. And the last thing I ate was an omelet and an avocado on the side. One of my friends was like, wait you eat whole avocados. I was like yeah, don't you. What's wrong with everyone. I like whole everything!
Back to love. I think I'm on my way to it, honestly! After the most tortured 4 years. I just feel like this is my year.
Do you play any sports? Unrelated but I want to know. And what's your favorite 90s rom com or 90s moment. I’m watching all Alicia Silverstone, all the time. I don't know why. I just watched The Crush which I have seen a million times. It's like Lolita but more angsty.
CC: So real. Love. Beautiful tweet even though I don't connect with kittens (allergic). Also I deactivated my twitter last week. It was no longer serving me. I'm newly addicted to TikTok. It makes me believe in the goodness of humanity/creativity.
Thank you re my boyfriend. He is so special and sexy and I want to GRAB him all the time. About to get on the train to go to his place in Bushwick where I NEVER sleep bc I'm a Manhattan bitch bc duh. But I'm trying to be more generous in 2023 so on the L train I go. He wants me to control my moods better (I am laughing). Also I just got a kindle so now I'm always excited to go on the train like it's 2019.
Worried about your avocado friend. Avo is like a sandwich. You can't save half BitCH!
I'm actually so athletic but no one talks about it. Basketball and volleyball were my favs growing up. I have a really strong arm. One time this guy stopped me on first avenue (I was 20) and told me I had the body of a swimmer. Ok king whatever you say! Felt like an insult. I am demure. I wish I had smaller arms but then I'd be too perfect and unrelatable. UGH.
I know you're a big runner which I really admire. Running is medicinal. I was just in LA for two months and played pickleball, tennis, and softball. Retiree realness. That town (as you would say) needs GOD.
Fav rom com is Bridget Jones Diary but that is more 2000s than 90s. 90s for me was all about the Spice Girls. I'm SUCH an Anglophile it’s humiliating. But they love me back so whateva! I've never seen The Crush!!! I find it so hard to sit through movies.
How do I stop caring what everyone thinks about me and focus on art? Also, what's your fav color/interior design aesthetic?
AD: I truly had a feeling you were athletic. I have such a crush on you. We should play tennis together. I run but mostly it's because it's something I can do alone. I don't like team sports. And tennis is as close as I get to...another person being there. But they’re also kind of far from you. Lol. Anyway! That's therapeutic to me. I can't deal with people anymore. I don't blame you for deactivating twitter. Everyday on there they're prosecuting someone or signing some petition or performing some self-righteous garbage. Relax! Makes me think they're all virgins. Everyone needs a drink or two before they log on, honestly.
I'm always about to move to LA. But I'm here in Miami and obviously coming back to New York but I can't handle the winter there anymore. No matter how many jackets you own you still feel like you keep wearing the same thing every day. So depressing. Life is about choices and aesthetics.
My favorite interior design aesthetic is white/beige/rust/bronze. I feel like everyone can tell I like being choked during sex now. Like did you ever see those photos of Kanye and Kim's Calabasas place where there was just one beige couch and all this space around it and white walls. That's me. I'm so minimalist it looks almost...abandoned. Deserted. But actually let's not go there because I have abandonment issues lol.
What is your least favorite thing to talk about in therapy and what is your favorite? To be honest you're ahead of me in not caring what people think. I haven't deactivated Twitter. But you know what, I never read what anyone says on there. Just like I rarely watch stories on Insta. I just post my shit and log off and get high and write poetry.
Also…what is the last thing you bought. Garment wise. And where would you shop if you had unlimited money? All I buy now is running gear. Obsessed with Alo and their baby blue 5 inch running shorts that have been SOLD OUT for DECADES. Someone reading this stack (fags) please help me obtain.
CC: The choking aesthetic LOL is not for moi. I need haunted library.
Don't you DARE move to LA. I feel most at peace in coats and boots. I'm so hungover.
Perfect question as I had therapy yesterday. I hate talking about my parents in therapy because I like them. I'm like LEAVE me alone stop trying to get me to hate my parents! Therapists are obsessed with everything being the parents’ fault. It's like, no. We blame it on the MEN who rejected me sexually in my teens. OBVIOUSLY.
I too avoid looking at insta stories at all costs but I've been slipping lately. Hm… something is in the air.
I've been on SUCH an online shopping bender. I keep FORGETTING when I buy things not because I’m drunk but because I'm so numb. Then the package shows up and I'm TOO LAZY to open it. HAHA. I'm sounding quite unlikable. Good. It's called EXPOSURE THERAPY.
I'm drained from my weekend of booze and talking over music but my psychic told me to stop drinking caffeine and I had anxiety dreams all night (I was asleep in a cabin being watched by a blonde woman who I did NOT trust). People say it's boring to talk about your dreams but I disagree.
I LOVE ALO. Athleisure is the most fun thing to buy cause I know it can stretch around my ass (flat but wide). I just got a pair of red snakeskin boots from Miista. They’re perfect and comfortable. Humiliating to care about clothes being comfortable but honey you know I like to get my steps in on the way to the gig!
Are you mad I was late to respond or do you not care about that kind of thing?
Also, what’s for breakfast?
AD: Not mad! If we were fucking then I’d be annoyed. I like men to respond to me right away (and with immense articulation on how amazing I am).
I’m also the type of person to order a bunch of stuff and not care when it comes. Unless it's hoodies. Obsessed with hoodies which are like pizza to me. It's just. How can you go wrong!
But I don't eat pizza and I want these two Celine hoodies that are like a grand each lol. I just ate cashews for breakfast. Having a third cup of coffee. I have high blood pressure. But I really don't give a fuck. 2023 is my year of doing whatever I want.
What's your biggest dream in life? And what was it 15 years ago?
I want to have a good time before I die. I'm so tired of fighting and the internet.
CC: $1000 on a hoodie is something I could never connect with but I support excess and luxury and am nothing if not a hedonist.
I had a migraine today because I lied about having one over the weekend. This is always what happens! Love u god <3
And I agree. People fear joy and jokes so deeply. It's like...let’s laugh, let’s be a little messy, let’s dance like no one is insta storying it. PUT THAT ON A HOODIE honey!
I've been very anxious the past few days. I have my show tonight and I'm going to wear a silver sequined corset. I hope I can put it on alone. It's so rom com when I'm a girl alone in my apartment and can't zip up my dress.
My biggest dream in life is to be a movie star. Also I'd like three homes (nyc, london, cabin upstate NY). It was probably the same 15 years ago. And now I've been in movies but not enough! It’s never enough. I'm waiting for that fabulous life altering ROLE. And I own zero homes. But that will change. Manifest!
I just want to do what I'm doing now but on a larger, more extravagant scale. What's your dream?
AD: I love your dream. And also the three homes. Mine would be New York, London, LA, Miami, Paris. I guess that's 5. I was never good at math.
How did your show go, by the way? You were so sweet to invite me to read at Club Cumming but I don't think I had enough funny poems then. Now I do. I think humor is lacking in contemporary poetry. Or just like, being able to laugh at yourself. Anyway.
I have so many dreams. To fall in love is the biggest. To finish this big writing project I've been working on for a long time now. To live in LA for a second. An hour. Whatever.
I used to throw this really amazing literary salon called Wilde Boys, and sometimes I think about doing something like that again because...well, it was really a moment. And so much now feels boring. But I think I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing and keeping my head down and working on all my stuff.
To end on a super cliche note (since we began with cliche)…who would you invite for dinner? Dead or alive. Give me 5 people and tell me why.
CC: I NEED Wilde Boys, that sounds so fun. But I understand. I've been hosting my weekly Club Cumming show for almost 5 years which feels insane LOL. And some weeks it’s like...what's it all for? But after every show I'm so happy I did it. Keeps me young. Keeps me alive. I really feel ill if I'm not performing regularly. I’m a total sicko. Would still love to have you come read one week when you're in the mood. It's very casual yet dare I say...life affirming.
It makes me laugh that you say one of your dreams is to live in LA. It’s like, you could do that this evening. Falling in love is the most beautiful dream I could imagine! Falling is the easy part. The staying so hard.
I've come down with a cold after a very wild/sexy week on the town, which I haven't had in a while. I think you'd be proud. No champagne though (I'm migraine prone like any artist worth her salt). And now I'm high on expired (2020) liquid day quil. Brain leaking. Went to city MD and it felt so good when the doctor felt my lymph nodes lol. I was like okayyyyy, go off masseuse. I'm flying to London tonight but I'm gonna miss my boyfriend. Back to cliche.
Want to know my fucked up response to 5 people for dinner? My family (there's 5 of us). I guess that includes me but I love having dinner with myself
I don't really care about celebrities. I just love my family so much, isn't that odd?
There's people I admire but I don't need to have dinner with them. I think I'd get so stressed out. Who would you pick? Miss you.
AD: Ugh so sorry it took me so long to respond. I got lost somewhere in Switzerland for a week. But I would love to come and read at Club Cumming. Anytime!
You're right. I literally could move to LA this evening. It somehow feels so possible when you say it. This is why we need friends. To remind us of the simplest things.
I think I want to have dinner with you, actually. Well...we did! With you and your boyfriend. That was such a spontaneous, beautiful night. I feel like we were all feeling the same thing in this weird way...about living in New York and being an artist and just how fucked up it all is. But also. What else is there to do, right? What was I going to do with my life, become a lawyer? I don't think so. Love you. Let's get dinner soon.
Oh god, I've just stumbled upon the best thing I ever read. Both of you are the exact people I'd love to sit behind on the train and read your texts over your shoulder. This is even better. I don't think I'll ever forget this voyeuristic email chain. How could I? Cat answering "my family, including me" for the five people she'd have dinner with... if I speak... (I cry). Love you both. The fact that you found each other - and in such a romantic way - makes sense to me.